Truth be told...

Truth be told, I can’t sing. No like really, I’m not saying it for attention. I’m tone deaf. If you’ve ever heard me sing I’ve either at a country concert, in church (because after 23 years I realized god doesn’t care) or I’m singing to my children. My entire life I’ve been surrounded by people who are amazing singers and there is honestly, nothing I’ve ever wanted more than to be able to sing well. Seriously, I used to make bargains with god if he would only fix my voice I would become a Christian singer or music director at a church.

 

Anything.

When I was expecting my first baby I remember telling Luis how sad I was that my kids wouldn’t have a mom who could sing to them. One of my fondest memories of my childhood is of my mom (or dad on occasion) singing my Amazing Grace, Favorite Things or Elsewise at bed time. While other kids got stories, or nothing, I got a song. And my mom, her voice is stunning. So I mourned this for my children even before they were born.

 And then something happened. I got this kid would loves music. Nico hears music in everything. Most recently, running his fingers over the spicks on his bikes wheel. So before I knew it, I was singing. Every day, all the time. And my kids respond instantly. My awful, tone deaf voice, can turn an epic meltdown into laughter in 30 seconds flat. I sing to keep them busy, to calm them down, and to be silly. But of course my favorite, to put them to sleep. It takes 4 round of Twinkle Twinkle and 2 rounds of Silent Night, in case you were wondering.

 My inability to sing well and its astonishing ability to sooth my kids is my daily reminder that doing something is always better than not. You know when you pass that person and you just know they need a smile or an encouraging word but you don’t know what to say? Say anything. When you’ve had a fight and you can’t figure out how to make it right? Say I’m sorry. When your friend is really struggling and you know $10 bucks could make or break their week? Give it up.

 Sometimes we over think it. We make it complicated. Difficult. Confusing. Truth is, it’s not what you say or how you say it, it’s only that you said it. Or did it. Next time you’re afraid, remember my voice. Yes my tone deaf, awful singing voice. And do it.

-Peace and Grace