Thank god for that!
This last week has been amazing. Topped by getting to marry my best friend at the most amazing wedding ever - if I must say so myself! I wish I could live it over and over; I'm so blessed. I got to spend time, as little as it was, with some of the most important people in my life. My crazy little girl took her first real steps, spoke her first word and opened her first birthday present. My things are successfully being shipped to my new home and I'm not nearly as broke as I thought I'd be. Whew!
Thats the good... and I'd be lying to say there is any bad. There isn't. Life is good. God is good. But I have still found myself in tears a time or two. Its natural I guess, I'm sure it is. Doesn't make it suck any less.
Our wedding was perfect but it was a reality of how many amazing people I have to say good bye to. How many faces I'm not sure when I'll see again. Yes, its my choice and yes its the right one. Even if my brother asks me every 3 hours if I'm sure I want to move. Its still hard. I know I'll be back and I'm blessed I can do that. Its the people that live far from my Florida "home" that I'll miss. Friends and family that live all over the country, my Grammy. New friends I feel like I'm walking out right when we were about to become even closer. Thank god for the internet and call phones. Thank god nothing is permeant.
Charlotte is officially thinking about becoming a big girl! She has been taking steps like crazy and just this week she has 3 words! You know this kid is trouble when her first word is "touch". God help us all ... She opened her first birthday gift tonight. I know I'm supposed to say it went so fast or I'm so sad she's growing up but I can't. Charlotte has taught be a lot this year, mostly how little sleep I can survive on. She has taught be to be patient, to live life one day at a time, not to put pressure or limits on things and she has truly stretched me to love unconditionally. I could lie and say it is easy to love her but that's not always the case. She's demanding, unappreciative and pretty cranky. Uh, she's a girl. Even through all that I can honestly say I feel like the most blessed mom on the planet. Charlotte has forced me to love being a mom. Its been a bittersweet year.
So my little princess, we can hash it out everyday for the rest of your life, but I am so grateful to be your momma. And I pray everyday you will be just as grateful to be my daughter.
Our things are off, we are down to days - 15 of them to be exact - and I'm not sure what are future holds. People keep asking me what I'm feeling. The answer is a lot. I'm scared and excited. I'm ready and not ready. I'm nervous and peaceful. All I know is that I have my family, a faith far beyond a country border and our days look bright. Really friggen bright!
When god is for us, who can be against us, right?
Even though I know these last two weeks will be filled with lots of tears, I will make sure they are filled with even more smiles. I have two full weeks to celebrate with my friends and family. The things I can accomplish in two weeks are scary ;)
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